I thought maybe with this next update I should talk about something a little more upbeat and exciting – so let’s do that!
We could talk about how sore my feet are from the shoes I wore to work earlier today, but I won’t bore you with that. The bottoms are literally like, raw, though. Girls I know you know what I’m feeling right now and how much it SUCKS.
We could also talk about the fact that I have eaten nothing but garbage for the past two weeks and how I feel like garbage because of it… but meh. Emotional eating is definitely one of my bad habits and although I haven’t gained any weight, and have been super consistent in my workouts, I literally feel like a walking carbohydrate.
I’m a blow-up toy in a swimming pool right now. It’s the worst. I have no energy and I know it’s from not fueling myself properly. Wah wah.
So what else is going on in my life? Let’s see…
I’m kind of at a loss in terms of the “dating world” currently. I think I mentioned this at some point but I deleted all of my online dating profiles in February or so. I’m just over it, it’s a lot of work. It turned into a bunch of useless emails back and forth and never progressed anywhere so I got rid of them all.
Then I started seeing this guy who I met through mutual friends and it was really exciting. He checked off everything on my “list” and we got along really well. I had high hopes for it until one day I realized that there weren’t any real feelings there other than friendship, so I ended it. It was less than a month but let me tell you – this guy went BALLISTIC on me a few days later. Let’s call him Jeff.
It’s a decent story, so I’ll share it. In all honesty, since I met him through mutual friends, there’s a good chance this blog post will get back to him. I don’t care. If you’re upset about me sharing the situation or the conversations then maybe they shouldn’t have happened in the first place? Just a thought.
Backtrack to one night that I had planned to go out with some of my friends. I ended things with this guy a few days prior, and from my understanding we were on good terms. He had been invited that night, and I had been informed of that before going. But I thought we were all good so I showed up anyway. He showed up about an hour later and things were going fine. There was a group of us there, hanging out, listening to a band. Then he texted me from across the table and asked if he could walk me to my car when we left. I said sure – didn’t seem like a big deal to me.
Fast forward about an hour and I’m pretty drunk at this point. By pretty, I mean extremely. Drunk enough to know that I shouldn’t drive home so I asked one of my friends to take me, and he did. I forgot alllll about Jeff walking me to my car. But he didn’t.
When I left I started receiving texts from him – he started by acknowledging that I was gone and asking if I still wanted to hang out the next day (sidenote: I had agreed to it perviously because when I ended it, he was very persistent on hanging out ‘one more time.’ Maybe I shouldn’t have agreed to that, but at the time it seemed harmless, until all of this went down) I told him that I didn’t want to see him any more than a friend. This is what happened next:
**please excuse the vulgar language
This went on a little bit longer, and eventually he calmed down and apologized.
Ya think I dodged a bullet there? Holy f&*king sh!t man. Holy f&*king sh!t.
I mean when it first happened I thought he made some good points. Maybe I am unrealistic when it comes to men? Maybe I have this idea in my mind of what I want my relationship to look like – and it’s never going to happen. It’s possible. I will say that if I know a relationship with someone isn’t going anywhere, I’m not going to waste my time. I’m 27. Twenty-Seven. I don’t have time to be involved in something isn’t gonna be long term, ya know? Clocks-a-tickin.
Anyway, there’s that. I guess that wasn’t really a more “light” post but at least now you know why I hate dating. You just never know what you’re getting yourself into next, clearly. Yikes.